The Woolly Mom

After much debate, and a staunch refusal to use anything Mickey Mouse (the Disney brand came keep their damn dirty paws off her until she’s at least two), I finally, finally picked a first birthday party theme. We’re going with Eric Carle’s book, The Very Hungry Caterpillar. We read it together everyday, she eats the corners of the book. And I never did find any Drew Carey party favors. So this will have to do.

Unfortunately, as you parents may have discovered already, kid party supply selection sucks. Sucks bad. Sucks real bad. We generally have about 5 major choices: princess, Mickey, Winnie the Pooh, butterflies, or Sesame Street. Then take your pick of whatever Disney movie is currently out, and add that to the list. Somehow Kung Fu Panda just isn’t quite right. Not because I don’t think ninja pandas are awesome. Or I wouldn’t want one living with me. Or I think that martial arts and bears don’t make a great birthday theme. But I haven’t seen the movie yet.

So the problem I’m having right now is finding plates and decorations to go with my newly chosen theme. I had the crafty idea to pick up some of the butterfly theme plates, and pretend that they have to do with the (SPOILER WARNING!) butterfly at the end of the book. It kind of works.

Then I decided to print my own invitations. This way I can just grab the copyrighted images right off the web for free (just kidding, you crazy lawyers out there!) and make invitations that actually resemble my theme. And I’m cheap, and this saves me money. But it turns out that I really stink at designing invitations and they didn’t turn out nearly as cool as some of my other design projects. No big deal, this is just a memorable peace of her life that will be cherished for years. And I’ve made it look like I pooped on a piece of cardboard and mailed it to my friends and family.

Next, on to the invitation list. Who the heck do I invite? This is a big dilemma. I want to include people so they’ll know that they’re important in our family’s life. But then I don’t wanna seem gift grabby either. Here, come sit around and watch a baby in a dress smash some cake. That’s always funny. Oh, and bring a gift. A good one! I’d like to say now that there’s very little she’s in need of (except what’s on her Amazon wish list…no, no - I keed, I keed) and I really don’t mind if no one brings her presents at all. Except her grandparents. It’s written into grandparent law that they have to. And I don’t want to bring the cops into this.

So now I’m deciding what friends or family would be offended if they aren’t invited. And which ones will be offended if they are. And then I’ll be wrong and everybody will hate me. Happy freakin’ birthday, Lily!

Right now my goal is to print and mail the invitations within the next week. And then I need to start planning a menu and learn how to bake a cake…since I decided to hand make a ridiculously elaborate cake. Stupid me. I’ll post pictures after I’ve made this steaming turd of a cake that people will laugh at, and I’ll pass off saying that Lily helped me make it.  And I was drunk. That’s right. I was drunk when I made it. Think they’ll buy it?

Rate this:

2.5

This entry was posted on Wednesday, June 25th, 2008 at 9:59 am and is filed under Celebrations & Holidays, Frustrations & Other Grrrr Moments. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.