The Woolly Mom

Woo doggies! It’s Friday again, and boy am I ready for the weekend. Today’s Retro Friday entry just perfectly encapsulates my mood today. I hope you’re having a very similar Friday. It’s a nice feeling.

Now if you’ll excuse me I have loads and loads of work to sit and look at. Hopefully some big strong man will bring home gifts of jewelry and takeout food as a token of worship. Yeah, I’m definitely diggin’ this retro lady’s attitude.

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3.4

Alright, fellow housewives and assorted ladies of “leisure”. Because it’s Friday, it’s once again time for a trip in our way-back machine. Let’s take a hop over to 1955 (perhaps we can hitch a ride with Marty and Doc), to a time when a housewife knew how to be obedient and was more of a performance artist than a woman. And ladies, I’ve noticed a few of you slacking lately - no slippers ready for your husband, no ribbons in your hair. So I think this is an important reminder from our retro predecessors about how we can be better robots housewives, too:

Yes, indeed. A good wife knows her place. Mine is right in front of the wine rack with a brownie in

one hand and a corkscrew in the other. But I promise to speak in a “low, soothing, and pleasant” voice after that first glass is poured.

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2.5

Thank heavens, it’s Friday! Which also means it’s time to dig out the kitschy way-back machine. Let’s turn our dials back to the late 50s and strap on some high heel shoes. Housewives, I hope you set your hair in rollers last night for our trip!

Ah, here we have little Penelope. Her kindly mother is fixing her a sandwich for lunch (and sipping a small cup of - what is that? bourbon? - on the side). 

I know, let’s guess what little Penelope is up to in this ad.

 Is Penelope…

A. Ravenously excited about her jelly sandwich?

B. Stuck in that facial position because her pig tails are pulled too tight?

C. About to bite her mother’s hand off with jagged fangs and then tear the flesh from her fingers one by one?

D. Praying to the dark lord that today she’s feasting on goat’s blood jelly?

Ok, moms of the world. It’s up to you to decide what Penelope’s up to. Make your selection and post about it in the Comments section. Happy Friday to all!

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2.5

I’m starting this new feature as a tip of the hat to all of the men and (sadly) women who think that us SAHMs are living in a repressive retro world of submission and servitude. Ha! I’ll give ‘em repression. Every Friday, let’s get in our way-back machines and take a trip to a time that a lot of society think we aspire to. Don’t forget your pearls and oven mitts for the trip!

bloop, bloop, bleep, bloop.

Ah, here we are in the mid-1950s looking at an oh-so accurate prediction of what life in the year 2000 would be like. And look at that! We’ve got waterproof livingrooms with built-in drains! (I bet those smell pretty!) I wonder where that hose is coming from?

 Note that the artist took the time to render an ashtray into the picture. They can’t even give this poor woman legs, but at least she can smoke her Virginia Slims in the year 2000.

I wonder how they expected her to dry this furniture, anyway? Where’s the next scene with her on her hands and knees with a shammy cloth? And are floor lamps waterproof, too, in 2000? Because that woman has got  to be worrying about getting shocked! I hope she doesn’t get her cigarettes wet. Or her waterproof books over there.

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2.5